I love you. Please stay all summer. My idea of a good time is 60°F or less. Shorts aren't a requirement in my life. If you looked at these legs you'd see why, they'd blind you. I don't need the beach. I just need some cold to be happy. Preferably with snuggles and snow, but in the middle of the summer, I'm not that picky.
Dear Creamsicle-colored pouf/loofah/whatever you want to call yourself,
I was very happy to have you in my life. You were orange and white and had soft spots and scratchy spots and I really liked that. I knew your demise was imminent when your string slipped one day. The next day when your mesh started to come out of place, I knew our relationship was doomed. I was crushed to have to put you to rest. PS. You made me consider going back to plain old washcloths.. :(
I was very happy to have you in my life. You were orange and white and had soft spots and scratchy spots and I really liked that. I knew your demise was imminent when your string slipped one day. The next day when your mesh started to come out of place, I knew our relationship was doomed. I was crushed to have to put you to rest. PS. You made me consider going back to plain old washcloths.. :(
Dear extremely scratchy pouf/loofah/whatever you want to call yourself,
We've been together a long time. Since Bahrain long time. Shoulda Been a Cowgirl shunned your cousin (we brought you both home on the same day!), but I held you near and dear to my heart because you seemed to take a lot of abuse and still managed to hold up. You've never had a leaky mesh problem and your string always stays tight. Thank you for always being my backup despite being replaced so many times. Also, you're the best mosquito bite itcher I've ever had. I love you as long as you love me.
We've been together a long time. Since Bahrain long time. Shoulda Been a Cowgirl shunned your cousin (we brought you both home on the same day!), but I held you near and dear to my heart because you seemed to take a lot of abuse and still managed to hold up. You've never had a leaky mesh problem and your string always stays tight. Thank you for always being my backup despite being replaced so many times. Also, you're the best mosquito bite itcher I've ever had. I love you as long as you love me.
Dear mosquitoes,
The back of my neck isn't a nice place to have a HUGE red bump. It's awkward and people probably think I have a huge zit back there. It also kinda itches which then makes me look like I have lice. So now people definitely think I'm gross. I hate you. Seriously. LOATHE YOU WITH ALL MY BEING AND DIDN'T MISS YOU WHILE I WAS IN THE DESERT!
The back of my neck isn't a nice place to have a HUGE red bump. It's awkward and people probably think I have a huge zit back there. It also kinda itches which then makes me look like I have lice. So now people definitely think I'm gross. I hate you. Seriously. LOATHE YOU WITH ALL MY BEING AND DIDN'T MISS YOU WHILE I WAS IN THE DESERT!
Dear crockpot,
Thank you for giving me a whole new lease on potluck dinners. Despite the fact that it took me more than 30 minutes to peel and dice 3 sweet potatoes, you worked diligently through the night to ensure that I would not go to this potluck empty handed. You stewed my potatoes and chicken all through the night and then with the help of Bets, I showed up with shredded chicken and sweet potatoes all in one pot and all I had to do was put the items in the same container. Genius. <3 forever.
Thank you for giving me a whole new lease on potluck dinners. Despite the fact that it took me more than 30 minutes to peel and dice 3 sweet potatoes, you worked diligently through the night to ensure that I would not go to this potluck empty handed. You stewed my potatoes and chicken all through the night and then with the help of Bets, I showed up with shredded chicken and sweet potatoes all in one pot and all I had to do was put the items in the same container. Genius. <3 forever.
Dear Adobe,
Thanks for making photo editing so easy! Can you please also create a tool that generates motivation to use all your awesome products? That would help me to further enjoy your current products even more. You're welcome for that idea, it was free.
Just a koala. On a log. Within touching distance. |
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